8 b4 8

When Dad was a lad, he studied at Cambers and encountered (but came no-where near completing) many strange and decadent traditions, including the 8 before 8 Club - members qualified by consuming 8 pints on King Street, before 8pm. Naturally, I wouldn't condone such excesses, but I think I can match those feats, albeit in pints of milk and/or poos.

Got off to a flying start this morning, at least for the latter, although Dad was less than impressed when his fave Syrian carpet was on the receiving end of a messy moment. Silly place to put it, if you ask me. I therefore thought I might give some tips for new dads:

1: nappies - make sure they're securely fastened on... us babies can wiggle out of more constraints than Hoodini

2: interpreting baby noises - it's quite simple. WAAAA means I'm hungry; WAAAA means I need a change; WAAAA... just keeping you on your toes.

3: just because it's mum's b'day today (and grandpa Colin's), doesn't mean she gets a lie-in

They'll learn...

:-)